Wednesday, August 25, 2010

The Cross

Update: Lillian and Owen are doing great. Since the wreck, they have been no different. Cementing the idea that we all should have infant carseats. The truck isn't a total loss. It has $12000 in damage to it. I am now driving an Enterprise Dodge Journey, and will have my truck back in about a month.
Grey is doing well. We are counting down the days til the week of Sept 6th when he will have his intestines put back together, and we can get that little man home!
I talked to my friend Kristi that was with us in the wreck, she seems to be doing ok. I on the other hand am having some numbness in my left leg and ankle.... I called the doctor, she told me to rest, ice and heat, and stay flat.... LOL, isn't that a funny concept!

I wanted to take time to blog about a cross I received a few years back from one of my patients I took care of in the St. Vincent's ICU when I worked there. Although I won't give out any names, (darn HIPPA) I just want to blog my feelings, and how motherhood has changed me, and how faith has molded me.

I took care of a man in the CICU at St. V's in 2003 I believe. A man that had a family of gold I think. This patient I never had the pleasure of talking to, never had the pleasure of encountering while he was awake, never had the pleasure of listening to him about his love for his family ..... but nevertheless, I know he was a special man. A man that had a strong enough family to sit beside him day and night. A man that's family came from different states to sit by him, talk to him, and just look at him while he laid in a coma. A man that didn't make it out of the ICU alive, but touched so many lives when he existed here on earth. This was evident by the amount of people at his funeral, and the genuineness of his family. One of only 3 funerals of all the patients I took care of that I have attended. I took care of this gentleman at a time in my life that was difficult. The economy had affected the job of my husband, I was married not to long before that, and I was having burn out in my career as well. At this time in my life, I needed them for me, just as much as they needed me to take care of their dad/husband. I know that sounds weird for a nurse to say, but there is no other way to put it; it is the truth. They renewed my love for my career, and more importantly renewed my need for faith.
One morning before this gentleman passed away, his son came to the nurses station and gave me a cross. He told me a story about this cross, that I never forgot. It was a cross that he had gotten on his honeymoon in the ancient city of Corinth in Greece. I believe it was at a small street vendor. He gave one to his mom, his wife, kept one for himself, later I learned he slipped one into the casket before it was closed, into his father's hand.... and gave one to me. He told me what I meant to their family, and how important his father was to him.... and he would miss him deeply. I took my lunch shortly after that, and cried. It hit me at that time what an important person my patient was, and how he was going to be missed so dearly by his family. This cross touched me so much. It has continued to touch me since that time.
I have prayed with this cross numerous times. Every time I look at this cross... I remember this family, and their father.... how awesome their love was for one another.
Most recently when Grey was sick, I prayed with this cross. After 7/23/10, I brought this cross to the NICU every day for quite some time, and when it was just Grey and I, I would stick my hands in the isolette, tell him I love him, and touch him with this precious cross. This cross has given me hope, given me faith, and given me the strength to go on when Grey was in the gravest of conditions. This cross is special.
After saying all this about this family, that patient, and this cross.... I have to say that I have nothing as special as the cross to give to the primary nurses that took care of our kids, and that now take care of Grey. Erin, Brooke and Becca... I cannot thank you enough for the love and care that you have given our kids, and now, especially Grey. I cannot thank you enough for the comfort that you have given us.
Laura, Kari, and Lindsey, I cannot tell you how it feels great to call in each night and know that you are taking care of Grey.... I know he is in good hands.

So this whole post is about the cross... and what it signifies to me... but also love and family. They are all important!


  1. Okay I am totally bawling! I had a rough day yesterday and this post couldn't have come at a better time. Thank you, Tiffany. Your family came at a special time for me too and it has been my pleasure being 'Aunt Erin.' I just love your family.

  2. Bawling. Seriously. Stop being so great. Your making us fight over Grey. You know we adore your family. I am just glad I got to be there from the start. Catching miss Lilly was amazing. And talking toddles out of his c section gown will never be forgotten. Love you guys