Tuesday, August 10, 2010

My Wish

"My Wish"
I hope that the days come easy and the moments pass slow,
And each road leads you where you want to go,
And if you're faced with a choice, and you have to choose,
I hope you choose the one that means the most to you.
And if one door opens to another door closed,
I hope you keep on walkin' till you find the window,
If it's cold outside, show the world the warmth of your smile,
But more than anything, more than anything,
My wish, for you, is that this life becomes all that you want it to,
Your dreams stay big, and your worries stay small,
You never need to carry more than you can hold,
And while you're out there getting where you're getting to,
I hope you know somebody loves you, and wants the same things too,
Yeah, this, is my wish.- Rascal Flatts-

This was the first song I played for Lillian and Owen on their way home from the hospital. As there were many days and long nights that I drove back and forth to the hospital listening to that song, worried about Grey and sometimes either Lillian or Owen depending on what was going on, crying. But crying isn't anything new to me these days, as it seems like hormones have gotten the best of me. But honestly the words to that song is something that I've thought about for the past few weeks. I've never really thought of children the way I think about mine, or about any other human being like that for that matter. I guess I really didn't know what being a mommy would be like. I didn't really know what I would feel like etc. I can tell you what I feel like. Bringing home 2 babies after being in a relationship for 10 years, with nothing but Todd and I (and the dogs).... is overwhelming. Our dogs Jasmine and Hendrix haven't slept in days I don't think, but overall, they are doing well. I have been emotional. Todd has been the rock, and our families have been very helpful. For so many years hoping, and praying that this day would come, now that it has I don't know how to act. I can't really explain the feeling other than... overwhelmed. There are a few things that I can tell you for sure. I love my husband, I love our families, I love these beautiful children, and although anxiety seems to overcome me at times... I look forward to the rest of our lives with these children, watching them grow, and mold into the beings they will be.

Tomorrow is another trip out of the house. Todd is working from the NICU on Wednesdays until Grey is home. I will be taking the kids to see Grey, and daddy there with my mother in law. I'll try to get some pictures of our triplet stroller.... you'll surely get a kick out of that!


  1. Great post - very honest. Isn't it a little bit of therapy to just get it all out there on the blog instead of built up in your head? Can Wed be the weekly full Maurer hang out day? PLEASE!!? See you soon

  2. Ok this made me cry, please remember mom isn't on her hormones anymore ;) LOL I'm just kidding. Can't wait to see you guys soon! Love on those babies for me. <3

  3. O.k. so let me tell you, your not alone. I don't think any mommy in the world really LOOKS or LOVES a child or children until they have their own. There is nothing like that over tired, question every move, wonder how you are going to get though the day feeling. You are right there are no words to explain what is going through your head just know it won't last forever I promise! There is light at the end of the tunnel. The worst thing to do is let it build up, make sure you talk to someone (anyone, even the dog can help sometimes when the phone isn't close enough and there is no way you are getting up until you have NO choice). Just so you know I am always a phone call away:) XOXOXOXO